Next time your thoughts are telling you something negative, try to say the thought out loud using a voice filter. Or just record yourself on your phone saying the thought in a funny voice.

Sometimes it can feel like we don't have a choice about what we think.

It can feel like our thoughts "just happen." And, in a way they do. They're often automatic.

But not all thoughts are true. And, you are not your thoughts.

Putting some space between you and your thoughts can be helpful. Then, you can start to see that there might be other ways to look at a situation.

Hearing your thoughts in a cartoonish bunny voice can help you remember that not all thoughts are facts. Why not try it now?

One way to create a healthy relationship with yourself and food is to practice mindful eating.

Mindful eating can help you pay attention to whether you’re hungry or not. And it can also relax your mind.

Mindfulness just means paying attention without judgement. It’s a practice of noticing. And so, mindful eating means eating slowly and mindfully.

You don’t have to make a special time to try mindful eating. But there are a few steps that will be helpful.

First, you’ll want to practice mindful eating without many distractions. That means phones and books aside. You might want to choose a meal you can eat by yourself.

Next, just start paying attention. Which parts of your body are involved in bringing the food to your mouth? What shapes does your mouth make?

What does the food look like? What weight and smell does it have?

Closing your eyes can help. What does it taste like in your mouth? Can different parts of your tongue taste different flavors? What does it feel like to swallow?

If your attention wanders to thoughts or feelings or sounds in your environment, no big deal. Just notice your attention has wandered and invite your awareness back to your meal.

Pay attention to when you start to feel full. Describe that sensation to yourself. How do you know you’re full?

As you practice more and more, you’ll be able to mindfully eat during any meal.

If you have any trouble, feel free to reach out to a coach for some help. If you try this, consider reflecting in your journal on how it felt for you.

First, what’s a negative thought you’ve been struggling with today?

Some examples of negative thoughts: I will never get my life together. No one likes me. I’m going to fail.

Our thoughts, even when they’re negative, are often trying to be helpful. They are trying to protect us in some way. But not all thoughts are true thoughts.

So, we want to see if there are any cognitive distortions in your negative thought. Cognitive distortions are patterns of thinking that are often negatively biased or inaccurate.

Here are some examples of cognitive distortions. All or Nothing Thinking is when you’re thinking in black and white. There’s no room for gray. Look out for words like “always,” or “never.”

Overgeneralizing. When something negative happens, you think it will always be like that. “I’m sad right now” becomes “I’m always sad.”

Mind Reading. This is when you think you know what someone else is thinking even if they haven’t told you.

Fortune Telling. This is when you think you know what’s going to happen in the future. No one knows what will happen in the future.

Personalizing. This is when you think you’re at fault for something that happened, even if others may share the blame. Or it may have nothing to do with you at all.

There are others as well, but this gives you a taste.

So, looking back at your negative thought, are any cognitive distortions happening? Which ones?

The last step in this process is trying to think of a more balanced thought. A thought that might be just a bit more true, fair, or rational.

Maybe “I’m going to fail,” which is a kind of Fortune Telling, becomes, “I’m going to study hard, but I am nervous.”

Or maybe “No one likes me,” which is a kind of Mind Reading, becomes “I’m having trouble making close connections. I miss my friends from my old school.”

You don’t have to believe your new thought 100%. But it can be helpful to realize that our thoughts aren’t always accurate. There might be room for more than one interpretation.

With practice, it will get easier for you to see your negative thoughts as separate from who you are. You’ll recognize the cognitive distortions in them. And you’ll be able to challenge them more easily.

Grab a piece of paper. Pick a behavior that you want to change.

Let’s say you decide you want to quit scrolling TikTok before bed.

First, write out the pros of not scrolling TikTok before bed.

Next, write out the cons of not scrolling TikTok before bed.

And now it gets interesting. Flip it and reverse it.

Write out the pros of continuing to scroll TikTok before bed.

And then write out the cons of continuing to scroll TikTok before bed.

Now you have a much more balanced picture of whether or not to change your behavior.

Consider adding a picture of your lists to your journal.

When you’re in one of those good times, try your best to savor it. Worries about what’s coming next can wait.

Grab something to write on if you can. Next we’re going to show you a list of positive experiences. Take note of ones you know you like and ones that you’re willing to try.

Biking, Getting a yummy treat, Cooking/baking, Doing your nails, Walking outside, Planning a vacation, Watching sports, Gardening, Playing with pets, Bowling, Golfing, Going for a drive, Puzzles, Skiing, Reading, Going to an amusement park, Viewing art, Playing catch…

Having a barbecue, Camping, Listening to music, Watching TV/movies with friends, Running, Makeovers, Visiting friends, Daydreaming about school ending, Lying in the sun, Planning for the future, Dancing, Organizing/cleaning, Swimming, Talking with friends, Singing, Making a gift…

Downloading new apps, Styling your hair, Enjoying a warm drink, Hugging, Hearing live music, Sledding, Getting a massage, Working out, Writing a letter, Texting friends, Looking at photos, Journaling, Playing video games, Dressing up, Being in nature, Surprising someone with a favor…

Playing ping pong or pool, Talking to a relative, Saying “I love you,” Writing a poem or song, Making a smoothie, Writing a story, Figuring out your favorite scent, Buying yourself a little treat, Watching the weather, Building furniture or working with tools, Working on cars

What did we forget? Add it to your list. Once you have a list, make a goal to do something on it every day. If you want, you can even keep track of which things bring you the most pleasure.

Try circling some of the ones that are the easiest to do any time, any place. Then, if you’re having a hard time, you can always distract yourself with something enjoyable.

If you’re having a hard time thinking of what you enjoy, that’s ok. Sometimes when we’re feeling down, it’s hard to remember what feels good. Feel free to reach out to a coach for some guidance.

Time to look at just the facts. What are the facts of the situation that no one would argue with? Here, we’re trying to stay away from your interpretation of the problem–or anyone else’s.

Now, on a scale of 0% to 100%, what do you think the probability of the worst case scenario happening is? In other words, what’s the worst thing that could happen and how likely is it to happen?

If the worst case scenario happens, how would you handle it? What are some coping skills that might help? Maybe deep breathing, talking with a trusted adult, practicing mindfulness? If you need help with this piece, reach out to a coach.

Time to think of your goal when it comes to this problem. What needs to change or happen for you to feel OK?

And now it’s time to brainstorm. Think of all the solutions you can. Ask for suggestions from others. At this stage, don’t be critical of any idea. We’re just trying to make a list of a lot of them. Quantity over quality right now.

Choose a solution that you think might work. If you’re not sure, go ahead and pick two or three.

Write out the first step of your solution (or your 2-3 solutions). Which step can you take the soonest? Give it a try. Then do the next step.

After you’ve done all that, it’s worth reflecting on whether it’s working. If it did, find a healthy and fun way to reward yourself. Didn’t work? Reward yourself for trying! And then try one of your other solutions.

The fact that you are here, thinking through the steps of your problem is so impressive. YOU are impressive. Your world is full of big problems. But we know that you have what it takes to keep pushing through them. You’re not alone. We can help.

To answer that, you of course need to have a solid understanding of what self-compassion is.

Kristin Neff is a renowned researcher of self-compassion. And she says there are three main components of self-compassion.

The first is being warm to yourself–even if you fail or have doubts. Self-compassionate people understand that failure and hardship are part of life. And they are gentle with themselves during these times. Judging yourself harshly is not actually helping yourself do better.

The second piece of self-compassion is recognizing that you’re human, and as a human, you’re not alone in your suffering or the ways you have failed. We are all imperfect. It’s part of the shared human experience.

The last piece of self-compassion is mindfulness. When you feel difficult emotions, you’re able to observe them with clarity, and a bit of distance. You are not your emotions. You are the observer of your emotions. It’s about balance. Feel your emotions and notice your thoughts, but try not to over-identify with them.

Here’s a quick exercise for practicing more self-compassion. When you’re having a hard time, take a self-compassion break.

First, acknowledge that this is a moment of suffering. You’re having a hard time. Say to yourself something like “This hurts,” or “This is stressful.”

Next, invite yourself to remember that suffering is a part of life; we all suffer. Try saying to yourself, “Other people feel this way too,” or “I’m not alone in this feeling.”

If you’re comfortable, put your hand on your heart, stroke your hair, or give yourself a hug. Say, “May I be kind to myself.” Or ask yourself what you need to hear right now and say that. Some other things you could say are “May I give myself the compassion that I need,” or “May I learn to accept myself as I am.”

You deserve self-compassion. You are worth it.